I'm Buggin' Out!

You just HAD to do it, didn't you, Richard? You just HAD to succumb to the urge and run that Google Image search for "COSTA RICA BUGS." And you were expecting to find what? Adorable little creatures with snugly faces like panda bears? You really didn't have any idea that you'd run into images like THIS....?!



I'll tell ya' one thing. If I have a bug like that on my face, there is NO WAY I stay still long enough for my friends to snap hi quality, nicely-framed photography. You might, however, get some nice shots of me beating my own face into a bloody pulp.

Oh, and THIS thing...



I mean, Dude. When a six pound beetle lays claim to your hot dog bun, that's his damn hot dog bun. I mean, look at the bear hug that thing's got there! Jesus.

OK, and I saved the worst one for last...



That thing lands on my shoulder and I'm taking off my damn arm with an axe. Or better yet, just kill me. Yeah, in fact, Kandi -- if you see one of these things within a quarter mile of me, just push me in front of oncoming traffic. What the F-CK IS THAT?!?!?!

I will say this. If there's one positive to having seen all these nightmarish creatures, it's that teen angst and ungodly humidity suddenly don't seem so bad.